Tag: wfmad

If you’ve never had writer’s block, go away.

If you’ve never had writer’s block, you should be writing this blog.

If you say you’ve never had writer’s block, I don’t believe you.

Writer’s block is actually several conditions masquerading as one. Saying, “Help me, I have writer’s block” is as useful as going to your doctor and saying, “I feel icky.”

You must figure out what kind of writer’s block  you have in order to cure yourself.

Blank Screen Writer’s Block, Type 1 – You stare at the screen or the empty page and you cannot think of a single thing to write. You want to write, but you have no ideas or words.

Blank Screen Writer’s Block, Type 2 – You stare at the screen or the empty page and you are so overwhelmed by ideas and words that you don’t know where to start.

Ticking Clock Writer’s Block – You put off starting a project and now the deadline looms and you are paralyzed.

Hysterical Monkeys Writer’s Block – Tribes of hysterical monkeys inhabit your brain, screaming about what a crappy writer you are. This, understandably, makes it hard to write anything.

Obsessive Compulsive Writer’s Block – Whenever you sit down to write, you are seized by the uncontrollable urge to clean your oven, scrub your roof shingles, or alphabetize the entire Internet on a hand-crocheted doily that you will then use as the signature item in the Etsy store that you’re going to open in time for the holiday sales rush. You forget about your novel until your writing time is up and you snap out of your fugue state.

The first cure is a simple one. Step away from the desk and go for a long walk. Or a run. Or swim. Something that will warm the muscles and cool your fevered brain. You might want to carry a scrap of paper and pencil with you (not in the pool) in case a line or two pops up. Regular exercise is an under-appreciated part of the writing process.

If you are suffering from Blank Screen Writer’s Block, Type 1 or 2, grab a book off your shelf. Any book that you enjoyed will do, though I prefer poetry for this remedy. You can also use the Poetry Foundation’s browsing function or mobile app. Copy a few lines from a poem or a novel and then treat those lines as a prompt and freewrite from them. (Do not use those borrowed lines in your novel; that would be called “stealing.” Use them to kindle your imagination only.)

Ticking Clock Writers Block can be cured by telling your editor or professor or whomever that you are going to be late, or by pulling up your big-girl pants and recognizing that fretting about how much time you don’t have is actually a way of creating drama in your brain so you don’t have to deal with the real issue; what is the next sentence you are going to write.

Hysterical Monkeys Writer’s Block is best dealt with by picking up all the monkey shit they are throwing at you and fling it back in their faces. Write on an index card in large letters, “CHILL OUT. IT’S ONLY A DRAFT.” and post it just above your screen. Be sure to preserve the first draft of your novel so that you can compare it to the final draft. That will shut up those dumb monkeys.

Obsessive Compulsive Writer’s Block is kind of magical. Recognize what you are doing and why, and then very quietly sit down with paper and pen. Write a list of all of the things that you could do when you are in this mindset, from braiding your nose hair to teaching the cat how to operate the coffee maker. The list can contain up to 4,000 items. Then list five things that you want to do for your story, like brainstorm character names, decide on a setting for one chapter, or writing a short bit of dialog between Character A and Character B. The trick is to give yourself a small, manageable task and ease into the writing.

There are several other small variants of writer’s block, but I don’t want to discuss them publicly until I finish my quantitative analysis on them. In fact, I might make this the topic of my dissertation, and then I can submit papers to pompous academic journals and maybe I’ll be invited to present at the Pompous Academic Writing Forum next year in Mongolia, and I should look up how much it costs to fly to Ulaanbaatar and…..

Or I could just sit down and write.

Yeah, that’s what I really want to do.

 

 PS – For another author’s take on the whole “To MFA or not to MFA” question, read Maureen Johnson’s blog.

 

Today’s Quote

 “If you get stuck, get away from your desk. Take a walk, take a bath, go to sleep, make a pie, draw, listen to ­music, meditate, exercise; whatever you do, don’t just stick there scowling at the problem. But don’t make telephone calls or go to a party; if you do, other people’s words will pour in where your lost words should be. Open a gap for them, create a space. Be patient.”

Hilary Mantel

 

Today’s prompt: Write a letter to your writer’s block. Describe how it works and how you really feel about it. Then serve it with eviction papers and write out precisely what you are going to do the next time it kicks in.

 

  Scribble… scribble… scribble…

So my ex-husband and his wife spent the night at our house last night….

You could use that half-sentence as a writing prompt. Those characters all lined up in row – the narrator, her ex-husband, the ex-husband’s new wife and whomever the character(s) are that lead the narrator to use the word “our,” create conflict and tension just by being in proximity to each other.

Conflict – interior and exterior – is a critical component of fiction. Without conflict you have characters limping around on the page boring themselves and the reader into a coma.

It is tempting to make your main character the good guy and create a bad guy who is the source of much of the conflict that your character must overcome in your story. I’ve critiqued a lot of manuscripts that are structured that way. It’s a good start, because it lets you get the characters in the page and basic plot elements.

But you can do better.

Characters who only have “good” qualities and habits are boring. So are antagonists who are purely evil. These are what editors call “flat” characters because they are one-dimensional.

Make sure that your characters are like real people, that they have positive and negative qualities and quirks. Give the good characters flaws, bad habits and a few awful secrets. Allow your bad characters to have redeeming qualities and wonderful secrets. It will ramp up the tension and give you more opportunities for plot twists.

By the way…

My ex-husband and his wife did spend the night at our house last night. They were up here to drop off her son at a college that is about an hour away from our house. We had a great dinner and enjoyed celebrating the fact that the village of parents that the four of us created about a decade ago has launched the final kid from the nest and into his adult life.

Here are the four of us at our daughter’s wedding in May.

Isn’t that a nice change from divorced people who are always angry and spiteful? A real-life plot twist!

 

Today’s Quote

 “I try to create sympathy for my characters, then turn the monsters loose.”

Stephen King

 

Today’s prompt: Come up with a sentence that puts two characters who might understandably be at odds with each other in a setting or situation that is going to make sparks fly. If you have the right degree of tension, the next fifteen minutes of writing are going to fly out of your fingertips.

 

Scribble… scribble… scribble…

 

I was once on a panel with the amazing and wonderful Walter Dean Myers, who is serving now as our National Ambassador for Young People’s Literature. (I mostly sat quietly and absorbed everything he had to say.) Walter was asked about the amount of competition and jealousy among those of us who write for kids and teens.

“We are not competitors,” he said. “We are co-conspirators. We support and encourage each other so we can make the very best books for our readers.”

This is a common sentiment among the authors that I know. It may help explain why so many children’s authors have critique groups or critique partners who are also children’s authors.

It can be a challenge to find the right critique group. I went through several when I was starting out, trying to find people whose approach to the work was similar to mine, and whose opinions I could trust. I tried a couple of groups in which I was the only person writing for kids. That was a nightmare. I had a critique partner for a couple of years who eventually soured on the business aspects of writing and gave up her writing. I finally found an amazing group that met once a month for an entire day. I worked with them for almost ten years until I moved out of the area. Since I live in the boondocks and travel so much, it’s been hard to be a regular attender at the great group  I found up here. I trade manuscripts with a few trusted writer friends and get feedback that way.

If you write for kids or teens and you are in search of critique partners, your local SCBWI (Society of Children’s Books Writers & Illustrators) will be able to help you. (If you don’t belong already, join SCBWI. It will be the best money you spend all year.)

 Critiquing friends and other co-conspirators are not just there to point out the holes in your plot. They’ll support you as you support them through the ups and downs of the creative journey. Writing is a solitary craft. Making sure that you have people in your life who respect and understand your work is vital.

 

 Today’s Quote

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”

C.S. Lewis, who was in a critique group with  J.R.R. Tolkien, Charles Williams, and  others

 

Today’s prompt: Write about a time when you worked on a creative project with a friend. See if you can go back to your childhood for this.

Bonus points – if you don’t have a critique group or a critique partner, start the search for one today.

 

Scribble… scribble… scribble…

 

All over America, college is getting under way.

(Note: this could be happening in other countries, too, but I don’t want to make assumptions about the collegiate calendar in places I’ve never been to, and if I stop writing to research this, I will be sucked into that swamp we call the Internet and won’t emerge for hours.)

So. USA. College.

This means that kids will start attending some creative writing classes. And a few kids and adults will start in on their MFA (Masters of Fine Arts) Writing program.

This worries me.

I divide the Academic Creative Writing Experience into two columns.

Column A    I know a number of people who had wonderful creative writing professors who created a safe, stimulating atmosphere that fostered creativity and led to growth. I know people who graduated with an MFA in Creative Writing and then went on to publish successful books. So far, nothing to worry about, right?

Column B   I also know people who stopped writing forever because their college creative writing professor was a bitter, unpublished writer who got his kicks out of making young writers cry. I have friends and fans who are tens of thousands of dollars in debt for their Creative Writing MFA, and who have not been able to land an agent, much less be offered a publishing contract.

I know way more people in Column B than in Column A.

Please do not take this as a personal attack. If you want to get a degree in creative writing, go for it. Have fun. Enjoy the gift of time and focus that academia offers. Write and dream. But I hope you enter these programs with your eyes open and your goals clear.

Publishers don’t care how many creative writing classes you’ve taken or what your degree is in.* All they care about is the quality of your work. If you can find professors and programs that will help you develop your writing craft, then it might be a good investment of your time and money.

Creative writing classes rarely, if ever, teach their students about the publishing business and the financial realities of being a full-time writer. (That’s why people are so stunned when I write posts like this one.) I’ve had a couple of heart-breaking conversations with writers who are drowning in debt because they had no clue how hard it is to make a living as a writer and they assumed that an MFA from a prestigious university would be their ticket to their dream career.

(John Scalzi has written a couple hard-hitting pieces on this and other weaknesses of MFA writing programs. Before you go into debt to get one of these degrees, I suggest you read what he has to say.)

If you want to be an engineer, you study for a degree in engineering. If you want to be a nurse, you go to nursing school. This equation, degree=career, is extremely fuzzy when it comes to the arts. Not just fuzzy. Swathed in yards of dun-colored cloth woven from dust bunnies, dog hair, and belly button lint. Just ask the theater majors wagging signs outside of a pizza shop.

Again – I’m not judging. It’s your life. Do whatever the hell you want with it. But be informed. Be a skeptical consumer before you plunk down hard-earned cash (or go into debt) for that degree. Know exactly what you are buying and take the time to calculate the true cost.

What do you think?

 *For the record, I have an A.A. Liberal Arts degree from Onondaga Community College in Syracuse, NY and a B.S.L.L. (Bachelor of Science in Languages and Linguistics) from Georgetown University, Washington DC. Number of creative writing classes taken? None.

Today’s Quote 

“All attempts at gaining literary polish must begin with judicious reading, and the learner must never cease to hold this phase uppermost. In many cases, the usage of good authors will be found a more effective guide than any amount of precept. A page of [Joseph Addison] or of [Washington Irving] will teach more of style than a whole manual of rules, whilst a story of [Edgar Allan Poe]‘s will impress upon the mind a more vivid notion of powerful and correct description and narration than will ten dry chapters of a bulky textbook. Let every student read unceasingly the best writers.”

H.P. Lovecraft 

Today’s prompt: Start with this opening line: “I had never jumped out of a window before, but…” Don’t stop writing for fifteen minutes. Don’t think, don’t worry, don’t edit, don’t plot. Just keep the pen moving, or your fingers tapping the keys. Stand back and let it flow.

Scribble… scribble… scribble…