Can I go back to bed?

Icky, scary dream last night. A cancer nightmare. Makes me want to go back to sleep so I stop thinking about it. But if I go back to sleep, I might wind up stuck in it again. I hate this.

Going to take Mer to school, then buy a gallon of coffee at Wawa. It’s raining. Maybe I should buy two gallons.

Feeling random, due to lack of coffee. Has anyone figured out the relative price of gas compared to milk and coffee? Gas vs. orange juice? Diet Coke?

On another random note – I’ve been receiving more homework help requests. Last night a reader asked for a list of similes and metaphors from one of my books. She needed it immediately so she could use it to study for this morning’s test. (But she was polite, which was nice.)

I did not send her a list. Instead, I rewrote the homework policy on writerlady.com. Here it is.

Note to teachers and students – Laurie will not do your homework. Sorry. She has done enough homework in her life. One of the advantages of being middle-aged is No Homework. Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

Is this too harsh? Comments anyone?

120 Replies to “Can I go back to bed?”

  1. Not harsh at all. It’s totally reasonable. And you use humor. 🙂

    Speaking of having people ask you to do their homework: I received an email from someone (who didn’t even bother introducing herself or even say “hi”) who told me the title of her novel and asked me for a list of editors/publishers who would be interested in seeing it.

  2. Not harsh at all. It’s totally reasonable. And you use humor. 🙂

    Speaking of having people ask you to do their homework: I received an email from someone (who didn’t even bother introducing herself or even say “hi”) who told me the title of her novel and asked me for a list of editors/publishers who would be interested in seeing it.

      1. No, I get it. You are one of the most supportive writers out there (esp the generous cheerleading)!

        I think these requests come out of ignorance, not malice. I’d like to think that as our web community of writers, publishers and readers develops, we’ll come up with an etiquette that everyone can agree on.

  3. Not harsh at all. It’s totally reasonable. And you use humor. 🙂

    Speaking of having people ask you to do their homework: I received an email from someone (who didn’t even bother introducing herself or even say “hi”) who told me the title of her novel and asked me for a list of editors/publishers who would be interested in seeing it.

    1. I agree. I’ve done volunteer reference for the Internet Public Library for several years now, and we get questions all the time directed to (often unnamed) authors asking them to answer homework questions. My favorite ones are those that say “I have to get an answer from you to this obscure/long/completely random question in order to get a good grade.” Either they’re confused or those teachers need to seriously rethink the assignment.

  4. No, I get it. You are one of the most supportive writers out there (esp the generous cheerleading)!

    I think these requests come out of ignorance, not malice. I’d like to think that as our web community of writers, publishers and readers develops, we’ll come up with an etiquette that everyone can agree on.

  5. No, I get it. You are one of the most supportive writers out there (esp the generous cheerleading)!

    I think these requests come out of ignorance, not malice. I’d like to think that as our web community of writers, publishers and readers develops, we’ll come up with an etiquette that everyone can agree on.

  6. I like your new policy…it’s not harsh at all. These people bothering you should be more responsible.

    I just finished “Prom”, which I loved. It was great, but not in the way that your other serious, thought-provoking books are great. Anyway, I loved it, and can’t wait for your next novel.

    Caitlin

  7. I like your new policy…it’s not harsh at all. These people bothering you should be more responsible.

    I just finished “Prom”, which I loved. It was great, but not in the way that your other serious, thought-provoking books are great. Anyway, I loved it, and can’t wait for your next novel.

    Caitlin

  8. I like your new policy…it’s not harsh at all. These people bothering you should be more responsible.

    I just finished “Prom”, which I loved. It was great, but not in the way that your other serious, thought-provoking books are great. Anyway, I loved it, and can’t wait for your next novel.

    Caitlin

  9. ugh. i am sorry about your dream and am drinking my own gallon of tea at the moment.

    i think being very blunt is best. i think you’ve also done it with a sense of humor.

  10. ugh. i am sorry about your dream and am drinking my own gallon of tea at the moment.

    i think being very blunt is best. i think you’ve also done it with a sense of humor.

  11. ugh. i am sorry about your dream and am drinking my own gallon of tea at the moment.

    i think being very blunt is best. i think you’ve also done it with a sense of humor.

  12. Not too harsh at all, and the perfect amount of funny to make your point and let your personality shine through at the same time.

    Now, on that gas. vs. Diet Coke thing, I hope you’ll let us know!

  13. Not too harsh at all, and the perfect amount of funny to make your point and let your personality shine through at the same time.

    Now, on that gas. vs. Diet Coke thing, I hope you’ll let us know!

  14. Not too harsh at all, and the perfect amount of funny to make your point and let your personality shine through at the same time.

    Now, on that gas. vs. Diet Coke thing, I hope you’ll let us know!

  15. homework helper

    Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    I think it sounds kind of harsh with only taxes! Why not use that handy “rule of three?”

    old people have to…

    and I like what (is it d_michiko?) wrote the er…not that I don’t like helping…

    your tour sounded fun. sorry I missed you in Pasadena.

  16. homework helper

    Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    I think it sounds kind of harsh with only taxes! Why not use that handy “rule of three?”

    old people have to…

    and I like what (is it d_michiko?) wrote the er…not that I don’t like helping…

    your tour sounded fun. sorry I missed you in Pasadena.

  17. homework helper

    Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    I think it sounds kind of harsh with only taxes! Why not use that handy “rule of three?”

    old people have to…

    and I like what (is it d_michiko?) wrote the er…not that I don’t like helping…

    your tour sounded fun. sorry I missed you in Pasadena.

  18. I hate getting stuck in bad dreams like that.

    As for the homework help policy… seems fair enough to me! But I am the same person that gives kids a stern lecture every time they attempt to order Cliff’s Notes from me.

  19. I hate getting stuck in bad dreams like that.

    As for the homework help policy… seems fair enough to me! But I am the same person that gives kids a stern lecture every time they attempt to order Cliff’s Notes from me.

    1. Heh. I’ve gotten bunches of panicked emails asking if there is Cliff’s notes or Spark Notes for Speak. I am so glad I am not in high school!

  20. I hate getting stuck in bad dreams like that.

    As for the homework help policy… seems fair enough to me! But I am the same person that gives kids a stern lecture every time they attempt to order Cliff’s Notes from me.

  21. Heh. I’ve gotten bunches of panicked emails asking if there is Cliff’s notes or Spark Notes for Speak. I am so glad I am not in high school!

  22. Heh. I’ve gotten bunches of panicked emails asking if there is Cliff’s notes or Spark Notes for Speak. I am so glad I am not in high school!

  23. Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    Thanks for the giggle!

    Oh, and I hope that your coffee made your day better than it started off.

  24. Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    Thanks for the giggle!

    Oh, and I hope that your coffee made your day better than it started off.

  25. Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    Thanks for the giggle!

    Oh, and I hope that your coffee made your day better than it started off.

  26. hi laurie! my name is Marika..and i go to santa monica high school(where you talked to some of the students) unfortunatley; i wasn’t able to see you speak, but i heard from one of my friends(with the communist hat) that you have a livejournal! i really really enjoyed your novel “speak” and i have read it more than once. i added you to my livejournal because i think ur a wonderful author, and i hope that you’ll add me back!

  27. hi laurie! my name is Marika..and i go to santa monica high school(where you talked to some of the students) unfortunatley; i wasn’t able to see you speak, but i heard from one of my friends(with the communist hat) that you have a livejournal! i really really enjoyed your novel “speak” and i have read it more than once. i added you to my livejournal because i think ur a wonderful author, and i hope that you’ll add me back!

  28. hi laurie! my name is Marika..and i go to santa monica high school(where you talked to some of the students) unfortunatley; i wasn’t able to see you speak, but i heard from one of my friends(with the communist hat) that you have a livejournal! i really really enjoyed your novel “speak” and i have read it more than once. i added you to my livejournal because i think ur a wonderful author, and i hope that you’ll add me back!

  29. Definitely not too harsh. It was all of two or three weeks ago when you made a post about students asking you to do their homework. I’ve seen it on your website, and I’ve seen it in your journal. If someone looked around enough to contact you, then they must have seen it somewhere. If that didn’t get through, then blunt’s the way to do it.

  30. Definitely not too harsh. It was all of two or three weeks ago when you made a post about students asking you to do their homework. I’ve seen it on your website, and I’ve seen it in your journal. If someone looked around enough to contact you, then they must have seen it somewhere. If that didn’t get through, then blunt’s the way to do it.

  31. Definitely not too harsh. It was all of two or three weeks ago when you made a post about students asking you to do their homework. I’ve seen it on your website, and I’ve seen it in your journal. If someone looked around enough to contact you, then they must have seen it somewhere. If that didn’t get through, then blunt’s the way to do it.

  32. Once upon a time when I maintained an Oklahoma City web site I used to get a lot of e-mail that said things like “SEND ME INFORMATON ON THE OKALAHOMA CITY BOMBBING, PAPER IS DUE FRIDAY, HURRY!” so I can imagine some of the things you must get. And no, you’re not being too harsh.

    Every few months there’s a hit on my educational technology blog for “fever 1793 rubric” or something similar, and I know somebody’s got a report due on your book–or is about to assign one. 🙂 [I happened to mention a paper I wrote in college about the Philadelphia yellow fever epidemic on the same page as a post that had the word “rubric” in it]

  33. Once upon a time when I maintained an Oklahoma City web site I used to get a lot of e-mail that said things like “SEND ME INFORMATON ON THE OKALAHOMA CITY BOMBBING, PAPER IS DUE FRIDAY, HURRY!” so I can imagine some of the things you must get. And no, you’re not being too harsh.

    Every few months there’s a hit on my educational technology blog for “fever 1793 rubric” or something similar, and I know somebody’s got a report due on your book–or is about to assign one. 🙂 [I happened to mention a paper I wrote in college about the Philadelphia yellow fever epidemic on the same page as a post that had the word “rubric” in it]

  34. Once upon a time when I maintained an Oklahoma City web site I used to get a lot of e-mail that said things like “SEND ME INFORMATON ON THE OKALAHOMA CITY BOMBBING, PAPER IS DUE FRIDAY, HURRY!” so I can imagine some of the things you must get. And no, you’re not being too harsh.

    Every few months there’s a hit on my educational technology blog for “fever 1793 rubric” or something similar, and I know somebody’s got a report due on your book–or is about to assign one. 🙂 [I happened to mention a paper I wrote in college about the Philadelphia yellow fever epidemic on the same page as a post that had the word “rubric” in it]

  35. I agree. I’ve done volunteer reference for the Internet Public Library for several years now, and we get questions all the time directed to (often unnamed) authors asking them to answer homework questions. My favorite ones are those that say “I have to get an answer from you to this obscure/long/completely random question in order to get a good grade.” Either they’re confused or those teachers need to seriously rethink the assignment.

  36. I agree. I’ve done volunteer reference for the Internet Public Library for several years now, and we get questions all the time directed to (often unnamed) authors asking them to answer homework questions. My favorite ones are those that say “I have to get an answer from you to this obscure/long/completely random question in order to get a good grade.” Either they’re confused or those teachers need to seriously rethink the assignment.

        1. Heh, orgy

          I’ve only read the very first issues back when I borrowed my friend’s Shonen Jump. However, based on my scant reading, I like Monkey D. Luffy, Zoro, and the evil pirate lady.

  37. Absolutely not too harsh. It’s not your job to do what a teacher should be doing or what a student should have done for themselves – it is quite arrogant to expect that someone else will give up their time to help them with their own work. But it probably is ignorance and lack of thought, rather than anything intentional. 🙂

    By the way: I read ‘Prom’ recently, all in one sitting, and adored it. I was especially fond of the substitute teacher and of course Nat’s grandmother. 😀

  38. Absolutely not too harsh. It’s not your job to do what a teacher should be doing or what a student should have done for themselves – it is quite arrogant to expect that someone else will give up their time to help them with their own work. But it probably is ignorance and lack of thought, rather than anything intentional. 🙂

    By the way: I read ‘Prom’ recently, all in one sitting, and adored it. I was especially fond of the substitute teacher and of course Nat’s grandmother. 😀

  39. Absolutely not too harsh. It’s not your job to do what a teacher should be doing or what a student should have done for themselves – it is quite arrogant to expect that someone else will give up their time to help them with their own work. But it probably is ignorance and lack of thought, rather than anything intentional. 🙂

    By the way: I read ‘Prom’ recently, all in one sitting, and adored it. I was especially fond of the substitute teacher and of course Nat’s grandmother. 😀

  40. Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    I’m getting to be a bit of a curmudgeon of sorts on this subject, but I’m personally tired of people saying how bad taxes are to pay. Unlike many people, I think they are a tool for building better communities, and that this current anti-tax fever our country has is going to screw us over big time in the very near future. IMPO.

  41. Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    I’m getting to be a bit of a curmudgeon of sorts on this subject, but I’m personally tired of people saying how bad taxes are to pay. Unlike many people, I think they are a tool for building better communities, and that this current anti-tax fever our country has is going to screw us over big time in the very near future. IMPO.

    1. If I thought the government was actually using them to build better communities, I’d agree. It’s just that these days I am furious about the spending priorities of the current administration.

      1. Yeah…the current administration frustrates me to no end. But I really do believe that they are in favor of disabling government programs that are beneficial to the average person so that their big business cronies can step in when the “failed” programs tank (from lack of funding and proper support) and make huge profits giving people poor versions of services everyone should be getting.

  42. Old people like Laurie have to pay taxes. That’s bad enough.

    I’m getting to be a bit of a curmudgeon of sorts on this subject, but I’m personally tired of people saying how bad taxes are to pay. Unlike many people, I think they are a tool for building better communities, and that this current anti-tax fever our country has is going to screw us over big time in the very near future. IMPO.

  43. If I thought the government was actually using them to build better communities, I’d agree. It’s just that these days I am furious about the spending priorities of the current administration.

  44. If I thought the government was actually using them to build better communities, I’d agree. It’s just that these days I am furious about the spending priorities of the current administration.

  45. Definitely not harsh at all.

    From one Philadelphian to another, I also just wanted to say that WaWa coffee is the best thing since…well…not taxes.:)

    On another note, I am really looking forward to reading PROM and am glad to see you had so much fun and so many amusing stories to share on your tour.

    *t

  46. Definitely not harsh at all.

    From one Philadelphian to another, I also just wanted to say that WaWa coffee is the best thing since…well…not taxes.:)

    On another note, I am really looking forward to reading PROM and am glad to see you had so much fun and so many amusing stories to share on your tour.

    *t

  47. Definitely not harsh at all.

    From one Philadelphian to another, I also just wanted to say that WaWa coffee is the best thing since…well…not taxes.:)

    On another note, I am really looking forward to reading PROM and am glad to see you had so much fun and so many amusing stories to share on your tour.

    *t

  48. Yeah…the current administration frustrates me to no end. But I really do believe that they are in favor of disabling government programs that are beneficial to the average person so that their big business cronies can step in when the “failed” programs tank (from lack of funding and proper support) and make huge profits giving people poor versions of services everyone should be getting.

  49. Yeah…the current administration frustrates me to no end. But I really do believe that they are in favor of disabling government programs that are beneficial to the average person so that their big business cronies can step in when the “failed” programs tank (from lack of funding and proper support) and make huge profits giving people poor versions of services everyone should be getting.

  50. Heh, orgy

    I’ve only read the very first issues back when I borrowed my friend’s Shonen Jump. However, based on my scant reading, I like Monkey D. Luffy, Zoro, and the evil pirate lady.

  51. Heh, orgy

    I’ve only read the very first issues back when I borrowed my friend’s Shonen Jump. However, based on my scant reading, I like Monkey D. Luffy, Zoro, and the evil pirate lady.

  52. Oh My GOsh

    Very good policy. I can’t wait ’til I don’t have to do homework! I wouldn’t even bother writing to an author asking those kinds of questions because for one I’d be scared to bother them, and for another I wouldn’t get an ansewr from half of them; you’re probably one of the few who reads all their letters.
    Cheers!
    Caitlin

  53. Oh My GOsh

    Very good policy. I can’t wait ’til I don’t have to do homework! I wouldn’t even bother writing to an author asking those kinds of questions because for one I’d be scared to bother them, and for another I wouldn’t get an ansewr from half of them; you’re probably one of the few who reads all their letters.
    Cheers!
    Caitlin

  54. Oh My GOsh

    Very good policy. I can’t wait ’til I don’t have to do homework! I wouldn’t even bother writing to an author asking those kinds of questions because for one I’d be scared to bother them, and for another I wouldn’t get an ansewr from half of them; you’re probably one of the few who reads all their letters.
    Cheers!
    Caitlin

Leave a Reply to bgliterary Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *