My weekend rants

We worked on the house and yard pretty late, ate dinner at 9:30, then we sat outside on our new patio. (I love that word. It feel so retro-50s. Patio. Patio. Patio.) We have a cool table with a firepit in it, so my BH made me a fire, and we lit citronella torches that kept the mosquitoes away. And then, because he is the most patient man I know, BH listened to me rant about various and sundry things until 1:30 in the morning. He is probably praying he grows up into one of those old guys who is deaf and needs hearing aids so that when I shift into Full Rant Mode he can turn the hearing aids off. That sure would have helped him last night.

I am trying not to rant today.

Except I have to. Must Rant About Star Wars. (warning – movie spoilers ahead)

We saw it last week with our son and a friend of his. As a social outing, it was a blast. As a movie….. meh.

Here is what I liked: the tying up of loose ends, even when it was not done in a fully convincing manner. It was oddly satisfying in that respect. Scenes in which the future Leah and Luke are born, when they are delivered to foster parents, etc., felt like putting down the last pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. This “episode” had loads of scene changes, and more diverse backgrounds than any of the others. I’m looking forward to watching the DVD just so I can freeze and study the different planets and cities. And from the story structure POV, being able to experience foreshadowing when you already know what’s coming is a nifty trick. And a couple of the fight scenes were engaging enough to have held even the attention of my former nemesis, Mr. Octopus Hands.

Here is what I didn’t like: hokey, crappy scenes, like the whole making the Frankenstein monster/Darth Vader thing. I almost walked out when he screamed that fake “No!” I felt force-marched through the “emotional development” of Vader. I wanted to slap that silly Padua or Pad Thai or Knick Knack Paddy Whack, whatever her name is, every time she showed up. Are we really expected to believe that a society that has perfected hyperdrives, space travel, and pod racers still hasn’t come up with reliable birth control?? Oh wait – I know why. Because females exist only for breeding in LucasWorld. I’m also disappointed that the plot wasn’t richer. In fact, all that jumping around to different locales is in part a cover-up for the thin story line. I wish Lucas has shown more and not told so much. (Sound familiar fellow writers?)

Summary: it was good enough, but not as great as I had hoped.

However, as soon as they offer the entire series on DVD, I will watch them back to back to back in order during a blizzard. That might change my mind.

No more ranting today. I really promise.

39 Replies to “My weekend rants”

  1. star wars

    Mostly I really liked the movie, but it did make me sad that Padme didn’t get to do anything in this movie but be Anakin’s wife, like she had no other purpose in life.
    And I hated the Frankenstien moment too.
    And I was once again, saddened that such a hot guy was such a terrible actor. EVERY scene with him, I wanted to scream.
    But I still love Star Wars.

  2. star wars

    Mostly I really liked the movie, but it did make me sad that Padme didn’t get to do anything in this movie but be Anakin’s wife, like she had no other purpose in life.
    And I hated the Frankenstien moment too.
    And I was once again, saddened that such a hot guy was such a terrible actor. EVERY scene with him, I wanted to scream.
    But I still love Star Wars.

  3. star wars

    Mostly I really liked the movie, but it did make me sad that Padme didn’t get to do anything in this movie but be Anakin’s wife, like she had no other purpose in life.
    And I hated the Frankenstien moment too.
    And I was once again, saddened that such a hot guy was such a terrible actor. EVERY scene with him, I wanted to scream.
    But I still love Star Wars.

  4. I was so disappointed!
    Hated dishrag Padme.
    Hated how ridiculous the catalyst was for Anikan “going to the darkside”.
    Yeah, I thought Frankenstein and that guy from Streetcar Named Desire who wails, “STELLA!!”.
    Hated that Obi Wan, who loves Anni, left him to burn to death instead of being merciful.

    Lucus owes me an apology and a re-make!

  5. I was so disappointed!
    Hated dishrag Padme.
    Hated how ridiculous the catalyst was for Anikan “going to the darkside”.
    Yeah, I thought Frankenstein and that guy from Streetcar Named Desire who wails, “STELLA!!”.
    Hated that Obi Wan, who loves Anni, left him to burn to death instead of being merciful.

    Lucus owes me an apology and a re-make!

  6. I was so disappointed!
    Hated dishrag Padme.
    Hated how ridiculous the catalyst was for Anikan “going to the darkside”.
    Yeah, I thought Frankenstein and that guy from Streetcar Named Desire who wails, “STELLA!!”.
    Hated that Obi Wan, who loves Anni, left him to burn to death instead of being merciful.

    Lucus owes me an apology and a re-make!

  7. you might like the word “patio,” but i like the word “firepit.”

    feel free to email all rants. one day we’ll sit on your patio in rockers and just rant.

  8. you might like the word “patio,” but i like the word “firepit.”

    feel free to email all rants. one day we’ll sit on your patio in rockers and just rant.

  9. you might like the word “patio,” but i like the word “firepit.”

    feel free to email all rants. one day we’ll sit on your patio in rockers and just rant.

  10. Star Wars

    I hated it. I also was glad to finally get something that had to do with the Star Wars I cared about in Ep 3 but after watching it I have trouble caring about Star Wars at all. Women in Star Wars have really gotten pathetic after the middle of Jedi. I don’t know if it has anything to do with George’s divorce that happened around the same time but I am also very disappointed. Leah was a bad ass until she got stoned with the little bears. Padmea like Anakin seems just plain stupid. It boggles my mind how they became high ranking official folk. The thing I hated the most was that Lucas threw the whole good vs. evil thing right out the window. Jedi are jirks, Vader is a thug, Yoda nothing know, The Emperor is doing all evil to save the world, I feel pity for Boba Fett, the space ships don’t look the same, nothing is funny and at the end of the day, the most solid character I would have say would be Jarjar Binks. He has the greatest understanding of good and evil. He is childish but not rude. He is humble and willing to learn.

    I looooved Star Wars soo much. I think that’s why I hate it so. Sorry for the rant. I so hope Lucas does not make more movies.

  11. Star Wars

    I hated it. I also was glad to finally get something that had to do with the Star Wars I cared about in Ep 3 but after watching it I have trouble caring about Star Wars at all. Women in Star Wars have really gotten pathetic after the middle of Jedi. I don’t know if it has anything to do with George’s divorce that happened around the same time but I am also very disappointed. Leah was a bad ass until she got stoned with the little bears. Padmea like Anakin seems just plain stupid. It boggles my mind how they became high ranking official folk. The thing I hated the most was that Lucas threw the whole good vs. evil thing right out the window. Jedi are jirks, Vader is a thug, Yoda nothing know, The Emperor is doing all evil to save the world, I feel pity for Boba Fett, the space ships don’t look the same, nothing is funny and at the end of the day, the most solid character I would have say would be Jarjar Binks. He has the greatest understanding of good and evil. He is childish but not rude. He is humble and willing to learn.

    I looooved Star Wars soo much. I think that’s why I hate it so. Sorry for the rant. I so hope Lucas does not make more movies.

  12. Star Wars

    I hated it. I also was glad to finally get something that had to do with the Star Wars I cared about in Ep 3 but after watching it I have trouble caring about Star Wars at all. Women in Star Wars have really gotten pathetic after the middle of Jedi. I don’t know if it has anything to do with George’s divorce that happened around the same time but I am also very disappointed. Leah was a bad ass until she got stoned with the little bears. Padmea like Anakin seems just plain stupid. It boggles my mind how they became high ranking official folk. The thing I hated the most was that Lucas threw the whole good vs. evil thing right out the window. Jedi are jirks, Vader is a thug, Yoda nothing know, The Emperor is doing all evil to save the world, I feel pity for Boba Fett, the space ships don’t look the same, nothing is funny and at the end of the day, the most solid character I would have say would be Jarjar Binks. He has the greatest understanding of good and evil. He is childish but not rude. He is humble and willing to learn.

    I looooved Star Wars soo much. I think that’s why I hate it so. Sorry for the rant. I so hope Lucas does not make more movies.

  13. how did you like the music? (i haven’t seen it but i heard the music was a lot better…i mean, from what i heard, the people Williams ‘borrowed’ from are really good…so)
    i really need to see this movie………

  14. how did you like the music? (i haven’t seen it but i heard the music was a lot better…i mean, from what i heard, the people Williams ‘borrowed’ from are really good…so)
    i really need to see this movie………

  15. how did you like the music? (i haven’t seen it but i heard the music was a lot better…i mean, from what i heard, the people Williams ‘borrowed’ from are really good…so)
    i really need to see this movie………

  16. Fever 1793

    Hey my names’ Katie and I’m in the 7th grade…for L.A. we just finished reading fever 1793! IT WAS AWESOME i absolutely loved the book. Your a very awesome writer and i hope u make alot more novels so i can read them 🙂 . bye

  17. Fever 1793

    Hey my names’ Katie and I’m in the 7th grade…for L.A. we just finished reading fever 1793! IT WAS AWESOME i absolutely loved the book. Your a very awesome writer and i hope u make alot more novels so i can read them 🙂 . bye

  18. Fever 1793

    Hey my names’ Katie and I’m in the 7th grade…for L.A. we just finished reading fever 1793! IT WAS AWESOME i absolutely loved the book. Your a very awesome writer and i hope u make alot more novels so i can read them 🙂 . bye

  19. yeh, definatley felt a chill of embarassment of watching such a stupid scene when vader came off the table like some kind of 50’s abomination instead of a human being.

    er something.

  20. yeh, definatley felt a chill of embarassment of watching such a stupid scene when vader came off the table like some kind of 50’s abomination instead of a human being.

    er something.

  21. yeh, definatley felt a chill of embarassment of watching such a stupid scene when vader came off the table like some kind of 50’s abomination instead of a human being.

    er something.

  22. :] It makes me happy that you remembered to mention Mr. Octupus Hands. Now that you mention it, patio is a nice word. Im glad I have an LJ because I can rant and rant and no one has to “listen” if they dont want to. :] Feel Free to rant here anytime.

  23. :] It makes me happy that you remembered to mention Mr. Octupus Hands. Now that you mention it, patio is a nice word. Im glad I have an LJ because I can rant and rant and no one has to “listen” if they dont want to. :] Feel Free to rant here anytime.

  24. :] It makes me happy that you remembered to mention Mr. Octupus Hands. Now that you mention it, patio is a nice word. Im glad I have an LJ because I can rant and rant and no one has to “listen” if they dont want to. :] Feel Free to rant here anytime.

  25. I wasn’t the only one?!

    When darth vadar fell to his knees is mustered angst and cried out
    “NOOOOOOO!!” I seriously thought I was going to burst out laughing but then I looked around the theatre (as best you can in a theatre) and realized I was surrounded by little kids and Star Wars nerds who might possibly have access to the lightsabers they bought at KB Toys earlier that night.
    So I decided against that whole giggling thing.
    Also, I’m so glad I found the link to your blog, I really appreciated Speak, it’s rad to be able to click my “friends” list and check out your writing every day!

  26. I wasn’t the only one?!

    When darth vadar fell to his knees is mustered angst and cried out
    “NOOOOOOO!!” I seriously thought I was going to burst out laughing but then I looked around the theatre (as best you can in a theatre) and realized I was surrounded by little kids and Star Wars nerds who might possibly have access to the lightsabers they bought at KB Toys earlier that night.
    So I decided against that whole giggling thing.
    Also, I’m so glad I found the link to your blog, I really appreciated Speak, it’s rad to be able to click my “friends” list and check out your writing every day!

  27. I wasn’t the only one?!

    When darth vadar fell to his knees is mustered angst and cried out
    “NOOOOOOO!!” I seriously thought I was going to burst out laughing but then I looked around the theatre (as best you can in a theatre) and realized I was surrounded by little kids and Star Wars nerds who might possibly have access to the lightsabers they bought at KB Toys earlier that night.
    So I decided against that whole giggling thing.
    Also, I’m so glad I found the link to your blog, I really appreciated Speak, it’s rad to be able to click my “friends” list and check out your writing every day!

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